:: acrylic paint and colored pencil on 1 1/2″ deep wood panel
:: measures 10×10″
:: white painted edges
:: ready to hang with wire on the back
This is painting #23 from my ‘100 Messages To Myself’ painting series.
This is an original painting. There is only one!
It turns out this painting was a foreshadowing of the evening to come… I had no idea why this phrase popped into my mind while painting this one, but I went with it. Baby G had been going to bed pretty easily recently for the most part, but on this night it was a different story. I’d been keeping my cool better than usual, but on this night something in me shook loose and the tears poured out. I know this won’t last forever and I just have to ride the storm and stay calm as best I can, but getting babies to sleep is literally one of the most anxiety-producing things I’ve ever had to learn how to do. It was that way with C, and now it’s that way with G. One day she will sleep through the night reliably. One day I’ll look back on all this with fondness and bittersweetness, I’m sure, and the rose colored hazy fog that comes with time and distance will cloud and shape-shift this sleep-deprived time I’m in now into wistful, happy memories… time is funny like that sometimes. (Here‘s the full message I wrote when I painted it.)
My life changed dramatically in August 2018 when my husband suddenly died and then again in January 2019 when my baby girl was born. It’s been a strange 15 months! Creating nearly daily art has been one of the main ways I’ve tuned in to my feelings and to myself as I’ve moved forward. Sharing the art that I’ve been making and the messages I’ve been giving to myself has been a powerfully healing part of my journey, and I’m so grateful to have the opportunity to share my images and thoughts with you.